controlling parent
hi guys,
so, i am really struggling with pleasing my mom when it comes to college and applications. on one hand, i know that this is MY future and that i should make my decisions for myself, but on the other hand i want to continue to have a good relationship with her because we used to fight. a lot. the big problem is that she is trying to basically do it for me and is then getting frustrated when i tell her to back off. i am the only one of all of us to go to and apply to colleges, and have the best GPA and extracurriculars, so i understand that she's excited and just wants to help, but she's always been extremely overprotective. i didn't think this would be a problem as i got older, but it has gotten to the point where she is asking people to get into contact with me about colleges and inviting basically strangers over without my permission to talk to me. she even scheduled the visit to my top choice college for me after i adamantly told her that i need to do it. because she actually has really good advice, and has been a great help, but has also been coaching me on how to apply for my whole life, i know what to do, but sometimes i do need help and so i told her i would ask when i need it but she didn't like that at ALL.
basically, if anyone else is also having or had this problem, what should i do to where i am still in control of my own future but won't completely destroy my relationship with my mom?
i have a similar issue but not as extreme. my mother wants the best for me and i’ll be the first generation to be applying and hopefully get accepted into a college. id just recommend listening to your mother but it is entirely up to you whether to utilize her advice! although she is the adult, you need to prioritize your needs first before hers. im sure you’ll be successful in the future and hopefully your mom will see that and realize that she should have been at least a bit laid back. i would just listen to her advice even though it may be hard and see how it compares to your own ideas and how you can build up on it!
thanks for the advice! it seems like we are both kind of in the same boat here. i have no problem listening to my mom, i just have a problem when she starts making literal plans for my future without discussing it with me or after i ask her not to.
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